Lillian Phoenix
MAIN CHARACTER SEASON 1
Someone once said the Canucks are better than the Montreal Candaians... That someone now drinks through a straw… permanently. It’s hard being a woman in a man’s world, even when you hold the unofficial world record for thwarted assassination attempts. With her most prized possession, Medix, a cute 3-foot-tall egg-shaped robot that can serve drinks, perform heart surgery, and form some badass body armor, she was a shoe in to the Legion of the Moose. Canada’s top-secret assassin force who put the red in the flag.
ULTIMATE WOMEN
THE NUTS AND BOLTS
Lillian's French Canadian heritage combined with her intelligence, combat prowess, and... directness, make her a powerful woman with all the problems that come with it. With her double Ph.D. in Robotics and Computer Science, she's the nuts and bolts of Evil Inc., helping push the boundaries of Eugene’s ridiculous super-science.
An interview with Lillian Phoenix
I thought I requested Celeste Rogers.
Well, GNN sent me. I’m lead reporter Richard Steele. Ms. Rogers is… doing her own thing, whatever that is. But, lucky for you, Ms. Phoenix, you scored me. *Winks.*
[Sighs] I already don’t like you.
Um, is the gun necessary?
We’ll see.
Look here; I’m Richard Steele. I’m kinda a big deal with the network. I was hired to do this fluff piece by Mr. Hennessey
You keep saying your name like I should care. Hennessey arranged this interview on MY orders, Dick.
A little egg-shaped robot hovers over to Lillian. She aims the gun at the reporter while tapping the robots head. A holographic interface appears with his profile and history.
…And the fact of the matter is, I haven’t vetted you. You look… typical.
Alright, alright. Calm down, lady. Why don’t we start with some basic questions… What do you do at Evil Inc.?
Basic indeed, let’s hope this doesn’t prove a waste of my time. Did you learn those tough questions at (browses profile) Brown Tech? *Ostie de colon*… Let me tell you something, Dick. Managing Evil Inc. is like playing a five-dimensional global chess match for how the world responds to you. I have my queen positioned to checkmate, but any wrong move and IT’S OVER. And if we go down, EVERYONE dies. But YOU’RE here to spin one aspect or another of my French Canadian heritage. What are you looking for? An “Eh”? *sighs* From what I see here, the only thing you are good at is creating fear and disinformation. I will not let the media brand E.V.I.L., Inc. as a terrorist organization. We’re trying to save the planet, does that sound “evil” to you?
Huh, no… But there were 36 deaths last month at an oil rig
Do you know how many men I have personally killed, Dick?
I… what does that anything to do
211
“WHAT?! Ok, um, another direction. Ms. Phoenix. How did you and Eugene White meet?”
Strike two. I will request Ms. Rogers again… You have 5 minutes to leave before I have Medix here, surgically remove your leg, or maybe a brain tumor- I’m diagnosing you right now. Just, my finger might slip and hit both…
Please, Ms. Phoenix. A fluff piece and photoshoot? We can even shoot around that scar
a gun audibly clicks
Yep, we’re done here! Where’s my PRODUCER?!
